Category: comedian
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Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
Groucho Marx
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Like other kids wanted to become firemen or astronauts, I wanted to make people laugh.
Steven Wright
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Women love a self-confident bald man.
Larry David
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The improv, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t, but when it does, it’s like open-field running.
Robin Williams
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I’m cranky.
Larry David
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Barbra Streisand has accomplished so much, and Dustin Hoffman as well. They are down to earth and approachable. I admire that.
Kevin Hart
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I’m glad I was born when I was. My time was the golden age of variety. If I were starting out again now, maybe things would happen for me, but it certainly would not be on a variety show with 28 musicians, 12 dancers, two major guest stars, 50 costumes a week by Bob Mackie. The networks just wouldn’t spend the money today.
Carol Burnett
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I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That’s like a free compliment and you don’t even gotta be smart to notice it.
Mitch Hedberg
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Usually, I walk around and think about things. When I come across a thought that makes me laugh, I write it down.
Demetri Martin
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All my pictures are built around the idea of getting in trouble and so giving me the chance to be desperately serious in my attempt to appear as a normal little gentleman.
Charlie Chaplin