Category: comedian
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I think there are so many books out there written on relationships and romance that women are the authors of. How can women know exactly how men think? And there are so many guys out there with relationship books who are just not telling the truth. They have shaded parts.
Steve Harvey
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I just feel like every kid is growing up too fast and they’re seeing too much. Everything is about sex, and that’s fine for me. I’m not saying I don’t like it. But I don’t think it should be everywhere, where kids are exposed to everything sexual. Because they have to have some innocence; there’s just no innocence left.
Ellen DeGeneres
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You might be the funniest guy in the world, but if you don’t have anything to talk about, people are eventually going to gravitate towards the guy that’s actually saying something.
Kevin Hart
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I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.
Steven Wright
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My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.
Rodney Dangerfield
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I’m hooked on Glenn Close in ‘Damages.’
Carol Burnett
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I’ll never be a TV writer.
Tom Segura
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I am always fascinated by the structure of things; why do things work this way and not that way.
Ursus Wehrli
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You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don’t want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something.
Mitch Hedberg
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I never do anything that I don’t want to do.
Kevin Hart