Tag: Erma Bombeck
-
When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.
Erma Bombeck
-
A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat.
Erma Bombeck
-
Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.
Erma Bombeck
-
Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You’re not out of it until the computer says you’re out of it.
Erma Bombeck
-
God created man, but I could do better.
Erma Bombeck
-
Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.
Erma Bombeck
-
Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown.
Erma Bombeck
-
Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
Erma Bombeck
-
I was terrible at straight items. When I wrote obituaries, my mother said the only thing I ever got them to do was die in alphabetical order.
Erma Bombeck
-
There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
Erma Bombeck