Tag: Erma Bombeck
-
I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent.
Erma Bombeck
-
I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
Erma Bombeck
-
My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
Erma Bombeck
-
Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.
Erma Bombeck
-
On vacations: We hit the sunny beaches where we occupy ourselves keeping the sun off our skin, the saltwater off our bodies, and the sand out of our belongings.
Erma Bombeck
-
It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
Erma Bombeck
-
House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad.
Erma Bombeck
-
When humor goes, there goes civilization.
Erma Bombeck
-
Why would anyone steal a shopping cart? It’s like stealing a two-year-old.
Erma Bombeck
-
Never accept a drink from a urologist.
Erma Bombeck