Tag: Erma Bombeck
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All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
Erma Bombeck
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Never order food in excess of your body weight.
Erma Bombeck
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Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.
Erma Bombeck
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.
Erma Bombeck
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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
Erma Bombeck
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Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It’s literary suicide.
Erma Bombeck
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My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?
Erma Bombeck
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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
Erma Bombeck
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Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.
Erma Bombeck
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Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people’s children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it.
Erma Bombeck