Tag: Larry David
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I don’t like to say anything good. I feel like I’ll jinx myself.
Larry David
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I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.
Larry David
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Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I’m deaf and I try to imagine what it’s like not to be able to hear them. It’s not that bad.
Larry David
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I tolerate lactose like I tolerate people.
Larry David
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I defy anyone to produce any evidence that the word ‘happy’ has ever crossed my lips. I am not now, nor have I ever been, ‘happy.’
Larry David
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OK, I’m happy. I’m happy. All right? I’m happy.
Larry David
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All of a sudden I discovered that I’m allergic to caviar. It was the perfect metaphor for my life. When I was only able to afford bad caviar, I could certainly eat my fill of it.
Larry David
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I’m anti-cheese in a salad.
Larry David
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I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.
Larry David
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I guess I still feel that I’m a comedian; if I had to pick one thing that I feel like I could do, it would be that. That doesn’t mean that I like it, but I feel that’s what I am.
Larry David