Tag: Phyllis Diller
-
Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
Phyllis Diller
-
Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.
Phyllis Diller
-
The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
Phyllis Diller
-
The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
Phyllis Diller
-
I buried a lot of my ironing in the back yard.
Phyllis Diller
-
Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?
Phyllis Diller
-
Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.
Phyllis Diller
-
My own laugh is the real thing and I’ve had it all my life.
Phyllis Diller
-
I’ve been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?
Phyllis Diller
-
Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
Phyllis Diller