Tag: Steven Wright
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Good jokes are gems. A good idea is hard to come by. I couldn’t give them to someone else, even for money. It just wouldn’t seem right.
Steven Wright
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To me, comedy is just twisting reality. It’s commenting or observing or twisting life.
Steven Wright
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I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.
Steven Wright
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I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
Steven Wright
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I kept a diary right after I was born. Day 1: Tired from the move. Day 2: Everyone thinks I’m an idiot.
Steven Wright
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I bought some instant water one time but I didn’t know what to add to it.
Steven Wright
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I met this wonderful girl at Macy’s. She was buying clothes and I was putting Slinkies on the escalator.
Steven Wright
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When I die, I’m leaving my body to science fiction.
Steven Wright
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Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
Steven Wright
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I never even thought of myself as deadpan until someone wrote an article about me about a year after I was doing comedy. There was a paper called the ‘Boston Phoenix,’ and someone wrote a description of what I was doing and that’s where I first saw ‘deadpan.’
Steven Wright