Tag: Woody Allen
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I’m not afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.
Woody Allen
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He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.
Woody Allen
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I don’t believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
Woody Allen
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I’d call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.
Woody Allen
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
Woody Allen
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I think being funny is not anyone’s first choice.
Woody Allen
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If my films don’t show a profit, I know I’m doing something right.
Woody Allen
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Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies.
Woody Allen
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Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
Woody Allen
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The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won’t get much sleep.
Woody Allen