Category: comedian
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Right before I decided to come out, I went on a spiritual retreat called ‘Changing the Inner Dialogue of Your Subconscious Mind.’ I’d never been to anything like it before, and all my friends were taking bets on how long I’d last with no TV, no radio, no phone. But for me that was the beginning of paying attention to all the little things.
Ellen DeGeneres
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In ’57, I got a job at the Blue Angel nightclub, and a gentleman named Ken Welch wrote all my material for me. I lived at a place called the Rehearsal Club that was actually the basis for a play called Stage Door.
Carol Burnett
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I am not a joke-teller. Stand-up, I couldn’t do.
Carol Burnett
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I’ve never been asked to appear on ‘I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here!,’ so I guess I mustn’t be on the professional skids just yet.
Robin Williams
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I like fruit baskets because it gives you the ability to mail someone a piece of fruit without appearing insane. Like, if someone just mailed you an apple you’d be like, ‘huh? What the hell is this?’ But if it’s in a fruit basket you’re like, ‘this is nice!’
Demetri Martin
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I don’t think it’s cool for people to say, ‘You shouldn’t reference God because I don’t believe that, and I don’t want to hear it.’ Well, there’s a lot of stuff I don’t believe that I still gotta hear.
Steve Harvey
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In the process of looking for comedy, you have to be deeply honest. And in doing that, you’ll find out here’s the other side. You’ll be looking under the rock occasionally for the laughter.
Robin Williams
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What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.
Rodney Dangerfield
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I love catching a snapshot of something that is just about to happen. Or maybe something that just happened, you know. But I like especially that just-before kind of feeling.
Demetri Martin
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Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man – there’s your diamond in the rough.
Larry David