Category: comedian
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Rice is great if you’re really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
Mitch Hedberg
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I have to write because if I don’t get something down then after a while I feel it’s going to bang the side of my head off.
Terry Pratchett
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When I was married, I definitely went through a lying period.
Kevin Hart
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The one thing about the business of entertainment is that you have to learn patience.
Kevin Hart
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And my only rule being if when I wake in the morning I’m looking forward to the things that I have to do that day, then I’m on the right track.
Demetri Martin
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My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
Henny Youngman
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I was very entertained by Betty Grable and Judy Garland.
Carol Burnett
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The quote-unquote ‘description’ of a leading man was once your tall, handsome man with the build of whatever, almost a trophy to some degree. I think now it’s about making a leading man what you want a leading man to be. In this day, you can’t deny talent. You look at Jonah Hill, you look at Zach Galifianakis, you look at myself.
Kevin Hart
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I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, ‘What for?’ I said, ‘I’m going to buy some sugar.’
Steven Wright
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Hollywood is run by people who sit up in their executive office, who are not connected to Mississippi, Alabama, Chicago, South Carolina. They know nothing about that, they don’t go to church, and they make their decisions about what they think is right.
Steve Harvey